Finding the funny in parenthood before somebody loses an eye...



Tuesday, December 15, 2009

MILF Monday: Caught with my pants down

My man caught me with my pants down tonight.

And, I wasn't even trying to lure him with sex.

It had been a busy day and I had spent it with the kids and cooking for a family Hanukkah meal.  I made a roast pork loin stuffed with winter fruit dressing, Orange-honey carrots, salad, home-made potato latkes, chocolate chip cookes, and a roasted chicken on the side.

By the time I was done cooking I had been on my feet for 3-4 hours and I really needed to pee.  But the food was done, my daughter had to go to  some activity, we had to celebrate Channukah before she left and so I decided to sideline the peeing in order to just get dinner on the table.  I'd go when we were all done.

 So I called everyone to dinner.

As I sat down, I secretly unbuttoned the top button of my Rock and Republic jeans under my blousey shirt so that the waistband, which I refused to accept was already a bit snug, wouldn't press in on my bladder while I was eating.

Then I forgot about it.

As I stood up from dinner to clear the plates, my boyfriend saw my pants unbuckled and broke down into a major fit of laughter.  "Really??" was all he said.

I was mortified!

I quickly buttoned the top of my jeans and attempted to convince both him (and myself) that I wasn't actually the kind of woman who unbuttoned her pants at the dinner...usually.

"You don't understand. I had to pee.  I was holding it in."

"Honey, most people don't have to unbutton their pants to make room for that."

Touche.

From now on, I'll pee before dinner.

2 comments:

  1. OMG, so funny!

    http://couponmommyof2.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  2. I tried to post previously but may have got caught in technical snafu. To reiterate:
    Not sure "milf" is something you can call yourself. Maybe "mylf" "mother you'd like to fuck". Also, seems whimpy and not sexy to use "f@#k" for "fuck." If you cannot say "fuck", you are probably not a "milf." Although "ef" "at" "pound" "kay" sounds a little like "poundcake" or "fat poundcake" even which is yummy if not sexy or milfy.
    Mazel to Ms. Maizes nonethel@$$.

    ReplyDelete

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