Finding the funny in parenthood before somebody loses an eye...



Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Milf and Cookies


Last night, I had a living room full of Milfs ("Mothers-I'd-Like-to-F*ck"...well, not me personally...not that I wouldn't, but I don't go that way...not that there's anything wrong with "that" way...oh forget it...they were hot.).

I invited a bunch of girls over for a discussion on the topic of "Milfology: Obtaining and Maintaining Maximum F*ckability," so I could gather information for my book ("Got Milf?") which will be out in Spring 2011.

They left their wet shoes by the door, put on the fresh warm socks I laid out for them, and got cozy. I plied them with wine, cheese, dips, breads, brownies, homemade chocolate chip cookies and a big pitcher of milk. My goal? Slipping them into their comfort zone so they would open up and speak freely about being Milfs. And BOY did they!

We talked about everything from what we think makes someone a Milf and the difference between being a Milf vs. a Cougar...to why we hate carpooling other people's kids and how we work sex into our schedules. We even shared "techniques". It was good stuff.

These women were definitely Milfs. Confident, open and FUNNY (although there was a heated debate about whether or not "Funny" was a Milfy quality - I said ABSOLUTELY!! Eventually, they all conceded...)

But the one thing that made these women truly Milfy to me was they ALL came out to help me. It was pouring rain, they all had kids at home (and someone watching them...at least I think so...), it was a big drive for some of them, AND it was a school night. (and a big shout-out to the Milfs I know wanted to be here but couldn't! They filled out a LONG questionnaire when they should have been doing their kids' homework.)

But these ladies came. They came in the rain. They came for me. Helping a friend and fellow mom who needed a push. My book delivery deadline scares the crap out of me and I was frozen. These women came and helped "thaw" me out creatively.

Now if that isn't hot...I don't know what is.

3 comments:

  1. I am upset that I was not invited...I guess I am not a milf!
    Maybe if you write a book on the out of shape exhausted wears the same fucking thing every day mother, you can have me over. (OSEWSFTEM........yeah, I guess MILF rolls off of the tongue better)

    and wow...quite a party it must have been, considering that every one of the MILFS came...you ARE a great hostess!)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nothing like a great group of friends - every girl should have one, two, six! Can't wait for the book!

    ReplyDelete
  3. OMG I wish I was there. I bet it was pretty juicy! I really want to know the qualifications lol, ....when is your book coming out?
    Love your blog, you are hilarious, glad you looked me up!

    Megan

    ReplyDelete

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