Finding the funny in parenthood before somebody loses an eye...

Monday, June 14, 2010

Remote Control

I don't watch basketball.

I don't have anything against it and I certainly love enjoying a basketball game from the comfy confines of a sky box where I can eat and drink at my leisure.  But I never turn it on.  Just too much other good stuff to watch.

So it's only natural that I would be a bit miffed yesterday when my husband (okay..."Was-band," as I like to call him) was over after a gymnastics exhibition for Livi and he turned on the game.  But fine.  I'm flexible.

So I went to my bedroom to turn on the much anticipated "True Blood" season premiere.  And what do I find?  My boyfriend was sitting in bed watching the Lakers game.

I said.  "Uh...Honey?  Steven's watching the game in the other room."

And here's what I guess is the odd part.  I added, "...why don't you go watch it with him."

"I'm watching the recording.  He's 30 minutes ahead of me."  That was his reasoning.  Not that it's my "Ex," or that I'm suggesting they share the experience.  What bothers him is that there is a 30 minute time lapse between their shows and he doesn't want to miss any of the action. 

So I go to the TV room.  "Um, Steven?  You...uh...hanging out here a while?" Then I tactfully threw in "Where's (blank) tonight?  What's she up to?"  (Blank is his girlfriend.)

"I don't know.  She's with friends."  He said.  Yes, he was firmly planted in front of my TV for the evening.  I could tell.

Back to in the bedroom, Scott is simultaneously playing virtual Mahjong and watching the game.  It was clear, he was not moving any time soon either.

Most people might think the problem with this scenario is that I have a husband and a boyfriend hanging out together in the same house.

But really?  What bothers me is the way they completely monopolize my TV's.   There's a good reason why women don't take multiple husbands.  We'd never get to watch our shows.

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