Finding the funny in parenthood before somebody loses an eye...

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

If you see someone lurking in the bushes outside my's me.

I hide from my kids and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one.

Tonight my ex was babysitting so Scott and I thought we'd get a night out.  Woo-Hoo!

We scooted out the door the second my ex showed up at 6:15.

"Bye you guys!"  smooch, smooch..."Mommy loves you!" and we tore out the driveway leaving skidmarks.

By 7:45 we were done dinner.

We couldn't go home.  I knew there was NO way the kids were asleep!  I mean, what's the point of getting out for the night if you have to come home to kids who are awake and want your attention?  That's not a night out.  That's a coffee break.

So I suggested getting a Thai massage.  Scott had his kindle so he waited for me and enjoyed the serenity of the Thai massage waiting room.

9:00pm I was done.  Darn.   Kids would still be up.

So we went for ice cream and burned another 20 mins.

It was iffy to go home.  Knowing my Ex, chances were the kids were still up.

So we cased the house.  We parked across the street and we peeped in windows.

It was hard to tell.  Lights were on, but we couldn't see any confirmed movement.  We tried another window (did I mention it was raining?)

Then I went to the kitchen window.  And was spotted..."HEY MOMMY!  WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT THERE!?"


I answered from the bushes.  "Just watching you.  Cuz you're cute."  She bought it...

It was clear our night out was over.  We went inside.

I guess it was a good thing anyway.  If a neighbor had spotted me in the hydrangea, it could have meant trouble.

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