This Lunchbox is Closed Due to Health Violations

I am not a restaurant. 

Unfortunately, this is news to my three children, who daily submit their “orders” for school lunches.

Livi’s order? Turkey and white cheddar cheese on white bread.  No crust.  No mustard. No mayo: “TOTALLY PLAIN!” she specifies.

Ben’s order? Ham and orange cheddar cheese.  No crust.  A “teeny tiny…NO, NOT THAT MUCH!” bit of mayonnaise.

Izzy's “Peanut butter and honey on whole wheat WITH the crust on” and “something interesting.”  I kid you not.  She has actually asked me to surprise her with something “interesting.”

It’s obvious why I hate making lunches.  

Believe me, I’ve tried...

Want to read the rest of my Lunchtime Rant on The Today Show Blog?  Just click here.